It may not sound like a big deal at all to skip the reflection piece of the puzzle when you’re doing any form of personal growth.
You might think ‘Oh I’ll remember’.
But I promise you, skipping this step is a mistake.
It’s incredibly important.
Of course the first part is to have a record of where you were at when you started. This is one of the reasons I love journaling so much. It doubles up as your very own personal timeline and also, when you reflect back it also serves as a visible interpretation of improvement and positive things.
It’s so, SO easy to forget where we’ve come from.
Especially when you don’t feel like you’re exactly where you want to be just yet.
This honestly applies to any area of your life.
I’ve had a few instances lately where I’ve reflected on something and been genuinely amazed at where I’m at now.
I really hope it gives you a nudge to do the same and serves as evidence that if you put in the work, anything is possible.
One of the BIG things that has happened recently is I’ve booked to go do something which is WILDLY out of character.
It’s absolutely not something that Fran of even 6 months ago would have felt able to do.
Or even considered being able to do.
Firstly, I’m going on a solo trip. If you’re on my email list you’ll know what I’m talking about. If you WANT to be on my email list head to www.franexcell.com and scroll down and nab any freebie that catches your eye.
We have the procrastination buster, Journaling 101, How to discover your Enneagram type and a few more. Links are also in the show notes but go have a peruse and you’ll hear all about my adventures and get some inspiration into your inbox every wednesday.
Anyhoo…back to it. I’ve never travelled by plane anywhere by myself…ever.
Flying and airports have always given me anxiety, all my Enneagram sixes out there will get this.
I’d check I had my passport about a million times, i’d worry about missing the plane, or going to the wrong place, or being late, I wasn’t great with take off, I’d get there at least 2 hours early and always worry I didn’t have enough time, i’d worry about not knowing where to go and find transport the other side, waiting for my bag to come out on the carousel was torture because I’d always imagine it was lost.
You get the idea, it was painful. But always less so with someone else there.
For a highly independent person this has always been a bit of a conundrum ha!
So…I have organised a huge trip, long haul, lots of different elements to it, and i’m doing it solo.
I also couldn’t be more excited.
It’s things like this that when you reflect back really show you how much the time, energy and effort have hugely paid off.
I’m always saying to clients, there’s a time in the future where you forget this was ever hard.
And it’s so true.
It’s so easy to forget how much you’ve overcome, how much you’ve grown, how far you’ve come.
But at the same time, do not give yourself enough credit because you’re not the finished product yet.
Spoiler alert there is no finished product. 😉 Life is about constantly growing and evolving, which is another reason this reflection piece is so important.
The other thing that got me reflecting on my own growth is linked to this but absolutely game changingly huge.
I’ve had a really bad needle phobia since I was little.
It was really intense, I could descend from being a fully fledged adult to regressing into being a scared child in seconds.
If I ever had to have any medical procedures I had to have gas and air before they’d be able to get the cannula in. I’d literally be scared of my hand and cry when I woke up.
I’d put off anything that required blood tests. Which is not great.
I have never travelled anywhere that required vaccinations because I was too scared to get them, it wasn’t worth it.
I was missing out on things I really wanted to do because of it.
So then Covid hits and I know I have to figure it out.
I was desperate to not have the vaccination.
I went at the last possible minute and having to wait in the long queue building up all the anticipation was NOT pretty by the time I got to the front.
I couldn’t avoid dealing with it any more.
I thought to myself, which was very reminiscent of my moment in 2014 when I started to do this work, I thought ‘I can heal this’ I know what to do, I can do it.
So I used EFT and self hypnosis to work through each element of this phobia that I’d had since I was 2 years old.
I held the intention it was going to work.
I used it to work on what I already knew.
I used it every time I thought about having to go again.
I used it every time I went.
I cleared it all out.
It wasn’t instant.
It was an effort.
But in the last 2 weeks I’ve booked a trip somewhere I knew I’d need 4 vaccinations.
And I went and got them.
3 of them were in the same 5 minutes.
So this is my long and convoluted way of saying.
The work is worth it.
Stick with it.
Whether it’s clearing a block to help you do amazing things in your life or business.
Or it’s clearing a life long phobia that’s stopping you from living the life you deserve to live.
Or it’s working on being able to leave a situation that’s making you unhappy.
Or healing from trauma.
It’s SO worth it to LIVE.
But reflection and self awareness is absolutely essential to being able to recognise how far you’ve come.
So often when doing this work the changes are subtle and build over time. O call it ‘slow and low’.
It’s not the big grand ‘I am healed’ that you see marketing to you that just leaves you feeling inadequate when it doesn’t happen for you.
It’s the slow and low stuff that unless you stop to notice, you might miss.
The way you reacted differently to something.
The thing that would normally trigger you didn’t.
You feel calmer in situations where you used to feel anxious.
But you only see these when you look with intention!
So please, if you have a few minutes today, grab your journal and start thinking through things like this where you’ve not allowed yourself to notice the epic job you’ve already done.
It takes time. But if you keep going you WILL get there!
And in a few weeks time I’ll be able to give you more lessons and reflections that come from my wildly out of character trip.
In a few months I’ll be able to share more about my lessons and growth from everything else that’s been going on in my life.
Because that’s the beauty, the lessons that you find in the discomfort of growth.
It’s glorious, don’t deny yourself those moments.
Fran Excell, Success Mindset Mentor at www.franexcell.com – Helping Business Owners & Executives Overcome Stress & Self Sabotage so they can get back their time, get off the emotional rollercoaster and feel more in control.
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