Success is a funny thing. We are so conditioned en mass and individually for what our version of success SHOULD look like.
We take everything in from society, parents and caregivers, friends, the media and we create a story about what it looks like and what it means to be successful.
We don’t question it, it just is.
We listen to the messages that we hear the most about what success looks like.
But is it really, who says?!
It’s not something we often even think to question.
Why would we, it’s fact right!
But clearly not because there are SO many different variables.
Do you value freedom or money?
Do you value time or status?
There is no ‘right’ answer and there is no ‘one size fits all’.
But it is in my opinion fundamental to know intimately what your version of success looks like.
What are you really, truly striving for in life?
What are you attaching to your identity?
Is it a title? An amount of money per year? A lifestyle? Just to be able to enjoy time with your family? Is it hustle? Is it ease and flow? Is it a lack of worry? Is it loving what you’re doing?
When we don’t really know what success looks like TRULY for us it keeps us always chasing the thing that we DON’T have, instead of taking time to acknowledge what we DO have. How far we have come!
The reality is that we all have different starting points, goals, traumas and experiences, ego stories and patterns to contend with and no two unicorns are identical.
We all have a unique make up of who we are.
So what would happen if we questioned our own version of success?
Is it even our own version of success at all?
Where did your beliefs around what success is, looks like and means come from?
What did you see and model growing up?
What are those beliefs? Are they true? Is there another perspective?
What is ‘good enough’ or ‘enough’ for YOU? Not what that is for someone else in your life. Not for Sally on social media. For YOU.
We can so easily get caught up in the comparison trap, particularly on social media, but there’s a few things we need to remember here.
One is you’re looking at the highlight reel. Y
ou have NO idea what’s going on behind social media.
You can look at someone else and wish you had what they had but do you REALLY?
You don’t know if they’re actually working 14 hour days.
If they have that level of success because they don’t see their kids, or their relationship is falling apart.
You don’t know if they even really have that level of success at all. By success I mean income in this instance.
You don’t know if their health is suffering.
With any of that, is it worth it to you?
Like i say, there is no right or wrong, or judgement.
But let’s make sure you’re dealing in facts so you can make the right decision for you.
Take away the layers of other people’s opinions.
See through the fluff.
When people talk about income they are VERY rarely if ever talking about profit.
You can very easily have a 7 figure business.
I have lots of friends that do.
But they may only have a 20% profit margin. Again, there is nothing WRONG with that. It’s just a very different level of income. Still a great one in my opinion.
But my point is, so much focus is put on the vanity metrics.
What’s important to YOU.
You can see why this is important to understand.
You have to be clear and see through the marketing speak to what is actually reality.
This is why I’m always championing the side hustle, the people who want to make £15k in their business right up to multiple seven figures.
I’m here for it all because it’s all SO valid.
It’s just different.
Don’t ever let anyone let you feel like your goals are not ‘enough’ and don’t mean that you are hugely successful in your own right.
Be clear about what you need and what you want.
So how do you want to measure it?
Know what lifestyle that you want to live, what that looks like, work out the financials, know your numbers. How will you know when you get there, what are you aiming for?
You may only need £15k to have the life that you want. The judgement of other people is not a measure of your success.
Do you actually enjoy your life? If you do that and make £15k per year then you’re winning!
What do you need to be able to live the life that you want?
What hours do you work, how many days per week?
Can you take time for lunch, a nap, to go for a walk, to meditate, to read?
Your value isn’t directly attached to what you earn or a title!
For so many of us, myself included, that’s been a huge part of our conditioning.
It’s something I’ve had to work hard to let go of and understand that that’s not what it’s about.
I was very lucky to have had a really successful career in advertising. I worked my butt off, but that salary, and that job title didn’t actually mean a whole lot of anything about who I was at my core OR how happy and fulfilled I was.
What were you earning in corporate, take off all your expenses that you would have spent going there, your lunch, travel etc. Is that pretty achievable in your business? It may be a lot less in terms of cash in the bank but the exact same disposable income. Does it being a smaller number mean you’re less successful?
We need to start challenging these ways of thinking.
There’s levels of success that are available for everyone…it’s just if you want to do what’s necessary to make it happen.
If you want to be a 7 figure business owner you absolutely can…there really is nothing stopping you other than yourself. But be clear about what it is that you’re wishing for.
What does it give you and what does it take away.
Start dealing in facts not fiction.
£100k to someone who lives oop north in the UK is going to go a LOT further than it would for someone down south.
We could sell our house in Kent and be able to afford a mansion or country estate in Cumbria. But what’s important to us is being close to London, near the beach, near family.
My point here is it’s really easy to look at someone else’s lifestyle and think you can’t have it.
But if you look a little deeper there are probably myriad ways that you could…it’s just other factors are more important right now.
Then it becomes a choice you make rather than something you wish you could have but tell yourself you can’t and then don’t allow yourself to enjoy what you do have.
What do you need to make you feel like you love your life? What are the non negotiables for you?
The big piece of the puzzle that gets missed off is whether you actually get to ENJOY your life and what THAT looks like.
The pressure that you put on yourself to earn the ‘buzz’ figures takes away from the success you’ve already achieved and takes away your enjoyment.
That doesn’t sound successful to me.
Knowing your good, better, best goals are great for this. Shoot for the moon and land among the stars.
Having the stretch goals will mean you’re always going to get further than you would without them.
But really understanding your numbers and what’s REALLY important to you is going to mean you win, every single time!
P.S – Last question…Are you sick of self sabotaging and procrastinating on getting your business going? Would you like to learn some practical strategies to stop you procrastinating WHEN it happens so you can FINALLY get the things you NEED to do DONE? Download my FREE guide below and I’ll show you 5 simple strategies to stop procrastination in its tracks!
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Fran Excell, Subconscious Success Mentor – Helping Business Owners Overcome Self Sabotage & Get More Done In Less Time at www.franexcell.com
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