Is it really ‘not working’?
Firstly let’s talk about ‘it’ in this context. I’m talking about 2 things really, one is your marketing and business efforts and the other is the inner, personal development work you’re doing.
I hear SO often people come to me and say ‘It’s just not working, something has to change’ and I always find when I dig a little deeper, that there’s a common theme when it comes to something ‘not working’.
Any ideas what it might be?
You’re expecting instant results.
You’re not giving something the time it needs to ‘work’.
But there’s something a little deeper going on here too.
All your unconscious programming is what’s causing you to not give it the time it needs.
You’re LOOKING, albeit unconsciously, for things to not ‘work’. And then making it something you think is fundamentally wrong with YOU.
Does this sound at all familiar?
So the way I talk about this to clients is often to imagine yourself on an island and you want to get over to another island. It’s not my analogy but I have NO idea where I first heard it!
So you’re on this island and you start building a bridge made from wood to get over to the one you want to be on. But then you decide it might be better if you built it in brick so you start building that bridge next to it. But then you decide it might be better to build it out of stone, so you start that one. Then metal so you start that one.
And you end up with several different bridges all about the same length. But no closer to getting over to the island you want to be on.
But if you actually put all those bridges together it would stretch all the way and get you where you want to be.
If you keep building new bridges you’re never going to get where you want to go.
So have a think about what makes you quit each bridge.
What are the thoughts and feelings associated with each one?
Are you looking for the ‘quick fix’?
Are you telling yourself you’re not capable?
Is it a sneaky form of self sabotage that keeps you thinking you’re moving forwards but really you’re distracting and denying yourself the success you deserve?
So this could be jumping from course to course, strategy to strategy and not being consistent with any of it.
Feeling like you’re missing pieces of the puzzle when really you just need to take the time to implement. But you’re quick to decide it’s ‘not working’ for you.
On the other side this could be not being consistent with any of the tools you’re using for personal development and just jumping from thing to thing. Meditation, Mindfulness, journaling but not actually allowing the consistency to do all of the magic rewiring that happens.
All of these are great but you need to choose something you will stick to. That fits into your life.
When we don’t get instant gratification in the form of the results we’re wanting, it’s easy to think it’s ‘not working’.
But play that through. What could happen if you stick with it?
What could happen if you kept doing that thing?
What is the story you’re telling yourself about why you think it’s ‘not working’ for you?
Strip back the practical, I’m not seeing results yet to reveal the unconscious belief.
It’s really easy to convince yourself you’re doing all the right things, but are you really?
Are you allowing things the time they need to start paying dividends…or are you flip flopping from thing to thing and not getting anywhere.
One of the ways I see this show up is having the information you need but still chasing more, from different voices. The underlying belief might be that you think you’re ‘missing’ something that is the thing that will make it happen for you.
You don’t need more voices in your head. Trim down who you’re following and listening to and focus. Allow yourself to actually do the work.
Be honest with yourself.
There may be things that don’t work for you, sure. But can you be super honest with yourself and say that you’ve done everything you can to make it work?
Are you switching again as a subconscious avoidance tactic?
So when you’ve already bought the course or paid for the mentor, make sure you do the work before you seek the same information from someone else in an attempt to find the ‘missing piece’.
The missing piece is usually the nervous system and mindset work. Get the support you need that will help you actually do the work. Make sure you have accountability and people who will lovingly call you out. Be truthful with yourself over your motivations for looking for more strategy or a new ‘hack’ or ‘trick’.
It’s all just being marketed to you because marketers know this! They know you’re looking for instant gratification. They know if you don’t get it and they market a ‘missing’ piece of the puzzle, or the thing that without paying them you just don’t know and therefore will never be successful…that you’ll buy.
But they also know you’ll find yourself in exactly the same situation after buying their stuff too.
So sense check yourself. Are you really missing a piece of the puzzle that’s going to finally get to where you want to be. Or do you just need to keep building the same bridge for a while?
Fran Excell, Success Mindset Mentor at www.franexcell.com – Helping Business Owners Overcome Stress & Self Sabotage so they can get back their time and feel more in control.
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