We all want success right?
Now, we all have our own version of what success specifically looks like but whether you want a side gig for extra income, £15k per year, 6 figures or 7 (no judgement on any, they’re ALL valid!) they’re are some key fundamental traits in my opinion that apply, whatever level you want to be at.
This is sooooooo key!! Especially when you’re starting out or juggling your business around other things like a job or kids.
You never know when the proverbial is going to hit the fan. Which it will,not being adaptable and flexible is going to REALLY hurt you.
Prioritising and not letting your negative emotions spiral when something hasn’t gone quite as you planned is what is going to help you win.
When you go into fight or flight you actively lose the ability to problem solve. When you can approach situations more calmly and rationally you will ALWAYS find a solution and get yourself OUT of the pain far more quickly.
This is one of my favourites and something that once you’ve created the habit becomes pretty fun! Certainly liberating.
You’ve got to let go.
Let go of the difficult client.
Let go of the things that feel heavy.
Let go of any ‘need’ you have for things to work because that’s just approaching it from a place of lack.
Letting go of outdated beliefs or habits. FUNDAMENTAL! Easier said than done sometimes and some are buried deeper than others but if you don’t root out the old rubbish in your unconscious that is holding you back success will always elude you.
Let go of your attachment to an outcome and start treating things as an experiment.
Failure is part of the journey and you have to allow yourself to not make things not working out how you’d hoped ‘wrong’ or mean something they don’t.
I approach everything with curiosity.
I wonder what would happen if I did this…
I wonder where that thought comes from…
I wonder if it would work this way instead…
Curiosity is one of my core values and is essentially a way of thinking.
It allows you to look at all sides and all potentials without judgement so you can make the best decision for you.
Or find the best way through something and look at what went wrong without judgement so you can learn the lessons you need to to do it differently next time.
Or find a new way of doing things that aligns perfectly with who you are.
You HAVE to give yourself a break and know you can’t know everything. At the end of the day, you don’t know what you don’t know. How can you!?
But if you beat yourself up when you don’t know something, or CONVINCE yourself that you do know it all (when you might not!), because you want to save face and let your ego get in the way you’re doing yourself a disservice. You’ll miss a valuable learning experience by saying ‘I know that’.
Be ok with not having all the answers, remember you’re human and we’ve all got a lot to learn.
This comes back to treating things as an experiment.
How much further along do you think you’ll be if you give things a go vs ‘this HAS TO WORK’. Which attitude do you think will get further quicker?
Giving something a go even if you don’t know how it’s going to pan out can be a powerful habit to create. It will allow you to push through your comfort zone.
It will allow you to learn valuable lessons.
To put it simply, if you give something a go despite the fact you might get it ‘wrong’ vs you don’t try something BECAUSE you might get it wrong…which do you think has the preferable results in the long run.
Stop looking at obstacles as insurmountable. They are the very things that will get you where you want to be. Successful people treat them that way. That’s the only difference. They are fine with getting things ‘wrong’ because they don’t see it as ‘wrong’ in the first place.
I know I harp on about this one but I can’t express how much of a game changer it is. It’s foundational in the work I do with clients and I guarantee you, every single one of them knows the power of it.
The positive difference it makes.
How much more regulated their emotions are.
How much more resilient they are.
The difference it makes to what you can achieve in a day.
Like I say. Game changer.
Successful people are comfortable being uncomfortable. They know that’s where the growth happens so they master the ability to sit with the tension. It doesn’t mean they don’t feel it. It just means they don’t let it rule them or their actions.
The most successful people I know seek out their unconscious programming. They seek out the patterns and the stories that they create or have created in the past.
These are the things that hold people back.
The abusive relationship, the bullying from school, conditioning from primary caregivers, when you’ve made something mean something that it didn’t really mean, the unresolved trauma.
You have to understand your unconscious mind. Understand how our brain, our ego, our programming all works against us BUT, is all changeable and we have way more control than we realise.
These are the things that get in your way. It’s no joke when people say success is 20% action and 80% mindset. The bit they leave out is that 80% is what leads to the ability to do the 20% in the first place!
On that note. Successful people understand all of my previous points and get the right help to navigate them through it. You can’t see what you’re not aware of, no matter how aware you think you are.
Things trip me up that I didn’t see coming. I have a team of people behind me to hold up that mirror and see what I’m not.
This can be blindspots in your programming, stories you’re telling, something in your strategy, where you might be missing a trick!
These are often a sticking point because we take action from our emotions. That can be dangerous if we don’t have a handle on it.
This isn’t about NOT feeling negative emotions, it’s being able to recognise them, recognise what they might be telling you, knowing when to regulate them so you can make a better decision for you and your business.
You can’t make a good decision from a negative headspace.
When we know that thoughts create your emotions, which create your actions which lead to your results you can see how important this skill is.
And it is a skill.
They all are.
They are all things that can be LEARNED.
They can become habitual.
No one starts out with all of these habits and traits fully formed but they are what often makes the biggest difference to results.
Making sure you’re looking at this in all areas of your life too because how you feel outside of your business is going to affect things IN your business.
P.S – Last question…Are you sick of self sabotaging and procrastinating on getting your business going? Would you like to learn some practical strategies to stop you procrastinating WHEN it happens so you can FINALLY get the things you NEED to do DONE? Download my FREE guide below and I’ll show you 5 simple strategies to stop procrastination in its tracks!
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Fran Excell, Mindset & Productivity Coach – Helping Business Owners Overcome Self Sabotage & Get More Done In Less Time at www.franexcell.com
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