OK, here we go. How you can and why you NEED to be more positive in your job!
I feel pretty passionate about this subject because I wholeheartedly believe no one should…or has to feel miserable for 70% of their waking life.
So do you, that’s why you’re trying to achieve the big stuff!
I wholeheartedly believe that the longer you continue to feel negatively about your situation or your job the longer and harder it will be before you achieve anything you’re proud of. I always say it but you will feel like you’re trying to push water uphill.
Think about it,who wants to invest in a negative nelly?
Who wants to be part of a group or team led by a negative nelly?
It’s dangerous and it’s toxic and it breeds even more toxicity and makes life HARD!
The negativity starts spilling out into ALL areas of your life. Think about this too. When you see a friend and they ask you how you are, what’s your reaction? What do you say?
Is it an instant ‘moan-a-thon’ about all the things you can’t stand about your life and how everything’s going wrong for you?
When someone behaves like that to you, how do you feel?
Likelihood is your friends and loved ones feel the same about you right now.
So we need to get that sorted.
And we CAN get that sorted.
So why do you need to do this to get your business taking off?
Let me tell you my friend!
So you won’t need to jump ship before you’re ready and go STRAIGHT into scarcity mode.
So you don’t quit on the business you’ve been setting up because you’re self sabotaging and all you’re seeing is the negatives and reasons that it won’t work so you’re procrastinating and not taking action.
So you won’t be miserable every morning you wake up with an ‘URGH’ feeling like it’s groundhog day and you’re peed off before anything has even happened.
So you won’t ruin Sunday nights anymore!
It’s all 100% possible…and simple to do, but it takes time and effort, so how much do you want this?
Reframing is one of my favourite tools and one I use DAILY now without even having to try.
Pick one negative aspect of your job right now.
How else could you look at it?
How could you turn it into a positive, a lesson or an opportunity?
Here’s a couple of examples for you. I reframed my 2 hour commute from a massive waste of time, I was SUPER resentful of ‘losing’ that time, ‘losing’ that money every month.
It was something I dreaded every single day and couldn’t see a single good thing about.
So I asked myself the questions and reframed it to my ‘learning zone’.
It’s 4 hours per day, 20 hours per week where I was learning learning learning. I now LOVE learning! I read 100 books in a year, took various courses on Udemy, listened to hundreds of podcasts. Think about the person you are now….and the person you’ll be after all of that!
So then all of a sudden it was a hugely positive thing for me and something I loved. I knew I wouldn’t necessarily take that amount of time for reading and learning if I was at home, I would have had an extra 2 hours in bed instead ha!
Gratitude is one of my favourite things in the world.
It literally changed the physiology of your brain.
Thankful Thursday is now my most popular and well loved day of the week in my facebook group. (you can join HERE) For good reason.
It will ALWAYS give you the warm and fuzzies and who doesn’t want that.
Gratitude is the opposite of fear and anxiety and also what’s known as an ‘intervention’ in Positive Psychology. You don’t see so many people talking about it because it’s some ‘wishy washy’ mumbo jumbo.
This stuff WORKS and it can and will completely shift around your thinking if you create a regular practice.
So, what are you grateful for about your job right now?
What friends do you have that you wouldn’t have met had you not been there?
What does working there allow you to do that you wouldn’t normally?
What does your salary allow you to do?
Where does it allow you to go?
Literally list every single thing you can think of to be grateful for about your job now and keep adding to it.
Keep a rolling list in your phone. Keep looking for just ‘one more thing’ to be grateful for
This is a seriously easy one to put on the back burner or forget to do all together, but we have to make sure we’re doing this as much as we can.
Eat well so you have energy, drink water so you’re brain is fully fuelled, get enough sleep and exercise, do things that make you happy…in short, look after yourself!
You can’t drink from an empty cup and I want you to remember the aeroplane analogy of always fit your own oxygen mask first.
Listen to your body and your thoughts and know when you need to take a break, do something good just for you, when you need a little me time.
Your body is always telling you these things, you just need to start listening!
When you’re stuck in Eeyore on a bad day mode you need to create things that you’re looking forward to and also things that can give you a sense of achievement and keep your brain nice and engaged by getting out of that boring old autopilot mode and trying something new.
When I did this I managed to retrain as a silversmith every Wednesday in a course in Hatton Garden in London and it meant I felt that sense of purpose in my life again.
I felt that sense of achievement.
That sense of doing something and being something MORE than the job that wasn’t lighting me up anymore.
This also works for scheduling something in the ‘me time’ category and taking something just for you.
You’re already learning while you’re setting up your business but this is important from both angles because there will be moments that you’re self sabotaging yourself in your business that you lose the sense of achievement that you need to keep going.
This will remind you of what you CAN achieve…and be fun at the same time!
Meditating is like having a little power nap in the middle of the day.
It will make you more calm when things are frustrating you in your day, it will allow you more time to have the best reaction you can to any situation.
If you don’t have the time or space to go all in and meditate then just take a couple of minutes to practice some mindful techniques, mindfulness is a form of meditation.
Focus on your breathing for 1 minute, do a body scan or activate each of your senses one at a time. (Click HERE for more techniques)
If you’re the kind of person that sits at your desk through lunch you need to move! Even if it’s for 10 mins, walk without having to get somewhere and breathe some air that isn’t stagnant office air. See how you feel.
When you’re in an office you can get so caught up in what people think of you.
This is human.
You just need to make sure it’s the right people whose opinion you’re caring about.
Next time you get triggered by something a colleague says or does, ask yourself…does it really matter?
Do you REALLY care what they think of you?
Will you care in a months time?
In an hour??
Just because they think something of you doesn’t make it true.
Asking yourself these questions will help you snap out of that triggered state so you can get back to doing your thing!
Ignore the office politics and don’t take part in the gossip, it’s just going to bring you down…so don’t do it!
100% my favourite technique for this and why it forms such a HUGE part of my work with my clients.
You can literally write your way to new neural pathways, in just 5 minutes per day! Whoop!
So here’s mine, I write down 3 things you’re grateful for, 3 good things that happened today, random acts of kindness, how many people I made smile, what I want by when and what i’m looking forward to tomorrow.
You can see how these will start to shift your thought process throughout your day.
It’s an amazing way to start or end your day and always keeps you looking for all those positives. This literally changed my life….in 5 minutes per day.
You can find 5 minutes. I hear you, making those excuses of not having any time haha. If you want to change the way you think you have to put the work in.
This one is going to sound a little more strange but I used to do it in the car on the way to work and honestly it does help, stick with me!
When you smile you activate muscles in the face that sends the brain the message that you’re happy and it releases all those lovely happy hormones and chemicals that send that same message, so you end up feeling pretty good! Worth a try right?
What is the first thing you do in the morning? Check your phone? Your emails? How do you feel?
I try to make sure I don’t check my notifications and emails until i’m properly up and atem and out the door.
I always think of 3 things i’m grateful for (write them down if you want to go one better!)
I’m an evening journaler but you can make it one of the first things you do and really set your intention for the day ahead.
If you have time you can do some yoga or exercise and get those endorphins pumping.
I also try and make sure I meditate, even for a few minutes and when you’re stupidly busy allll these things will set you up for handling your day in a much better way.
Remember life is too short to live for the weekend and wish your life away waiting for retirement, you know you don’t want that for yourself.
So you have to take the action to change it. You get one life, one opportunity to live it. So stop holding yourself back and self sabotaging on going after the thing you DO want.
You KNOW you want this and you KNOW you can do it. You see other people doing it, we’ve just got to get you taking the action! Be honest about where you haven’t been putting in the effort but if you did it would make things much better.
Remember you do get a choice in how you feel. Use these tools and techniques to shift your thought processes and create the amazing business you know you could if you just got out of your own way
This is a skill you have to master, it takes tie and it takes practice but if you’re committed to achieving it then you will!
If you want to explore this further, have any questions or want some accountability then come join me in my private community below!!
Fran Excell, Subconscious Success Mentor – Helping Business Owners Overcome Self Sabotage & Get More Done In Less Time at www.franexcell.com
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© 2023 Fran Excell. Success mindset mentor for entrepreneurs & executives.
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Thank you, i’m so glad you enjoyed it! Fx